Everything.

It's late, I'm not tired, and it's going to be one of those nights.

I currently have an upset stomach. And it's disgusting.

I had one of the most amazing times of my life these past few days. Tucker gives the beat to my heart. (:

We've been together since Wednesday. His graduation party was yesterday, the ceremony was today, I helped his mother on Friday. Ugh, busy weekend. But, so worth it. I loved spending so much time with him, and being around him all the time. I loved him being there to cuddle up with. I think what made my day the most is the fact that he always came to give me a good night kiss and came to tuck me in, even if he wasn't going to bed. Goes to show how much he cares. He has the biggest heart. <3

I can't believe that he has now graduated. Time flew by so fast on us.

One of the best things, is that his family was there a lot this weekend. I really like his family, and I believe they like me as well. His gram is one of the funniest people ever. She LOVES to give me shit. His aunt is really nice and always chats with me. And I am finally starting to think his mom likes me. I think she has for the time that we have been dating, but I just get paranoid about it. She probably thinks I am an airhead though. Haha. Ah, I like her anyway.

But, being with his family made me realize how much I missed and needed mine. I missed MY mother. My mother and I are close in some sort of weird way.. we don't hit the malls and spend hundreds of dollars on Saturdays or anything. But we do like to watch TV and hit up the thrift stores once in awhile. She's an amazing person. I shouldn't treat her like I do sometimes. I love her.

I have also realized the I am in a hurry to grow up. But, at the same time, the more grown up I get, the more I want to be little. I think I have a fear of dying, a severe fear of dying. Maybe that's why I want to rush life. Maybe not. I'm not quite sure what's up there, if anything. I hope something is there though.

I was watching Dr. Phil earlier and it was about these girls who beat and tortured a 12 year old girl, and later set her on fire and let her burn to death. Oh my god. I could not imagine. I would not want to die like that. But then again, who would? I'm so afraid of dying tragically.

The world can be so happy, but yet so sad.

I think I have learned to cherish the good and forget the bad. In which all people should.

Summer is here. I'm not sure I want it to be. But, I guess I should accept it.

Tucker will be picking up more hours. I'm really scared for that. I don't want him to grow up on me. I'm afraid that he's going to up and leave for something or someone better. I think I would probably die. So, I hold on to every second. He's so amazing to me, I want to hold all those moments forever. They're the most important.

So for now, I'll hold tight. And I'll never let go.